At Simple Steps Fertility, we believe surrogacy is one of the most generous and life-changing gifts a person can offer. But generosity is just the beginning. The journey itself is layered, emotional, and deeply personal.
We spoke with experienced surrogates who shared what they wish they had known before starting. Their stories are honest, heartfelt, and grounded in care, just like our approach.
1. It’s Not Just Medical. It’s Emotional.
“I expected the shots and appointments. What I didn’t expect was the wave of emotions: excitement, nervousness, even grief when it was over. The support I needed was as much emotional as it was physical.”
Yes, there are doctors, checkups, and injections. But there’s also a quiet intensity to the experience. Moments of connection. Unexpected doubts. Joy that catches you off guard. We prepare you for both sides of the journey: what’s happening in your body and what’s happening in your heart.
2. You Don’t Have to Know Everything Right Away
“I thought I needed to have all the answers before I even applied. But Simple Steps walked with me through each part. I learned along the way, and that was okay.”
If you’re thinking about surrogacy but still have questions, that’s completely normal. In fact, it’s expected. We walk with you, one step at a time. From medical screening to matching with intended parents to understanding contracts, you’ll never be left figuring it out alone.
Read: How Our Surrogate Matching Process Works
3. You’ll Build a Bond, Even If It’s Not What You Expect
“I worried about the relationship with the intended parents. Would it be awkward? Too close? Too distant? In the end, it became its own kind of friendship, built on purpose, not pressure.”
Every surrogate-intended parent relationship is different. Some remain close for years. Others keep things simple and respectful. Either way, we help set clear expectations up front, so you’re never navigating uncertainty on your own.
4. You’ll Be Proud of Yourself in a Way You Can’t Yet Imagine
“I didn’t know how powerful it would feel to give someone their baby. It’s not something you can explain; it changes you.”
You’ll carry this experience with you forever. Not just as a story you may tell, but as something you feel in your core. You’ll remember the hugs, the tears, the quiet moments. And you’ll know, deep down, you made a family possible.
Common Questions About Becoming a Surrogate
Is being a surrogate emotionally hard?
Is being a surrogate emotionally hard? It can be. That’s why emotional support is part of every surrogate journey with us. Some moments are joyful, others may be bittersweet, but you’re never left to navigate them alone. For additional resources and support on the emotional aspects of family building, you can visit RESOLVE: The National Infertility Association.
Do I need to have had children before becoming a surrogate?
Yes. One of the basic medical requirements is that you’ve had at least one uncomplicated pregnancy and delivery. This ensures your body is prepared for the process ahead.
How long is the surrogacy process?
From application to delivery, the process typically takes 12–18 months. You can read more in our Step-by-Step Surrogacy Timeline.
Will I get to choose the family I carry for?
Absolutely. Matching is mutual, and we ensure it’s built on aligned values, expectations, and comfort levels.
Final Thought: Take the First Step, and We’ll Walk With You All The Way There, and Beyond.
The decision to become a surrogate is deeply personal. It shouldn’t be rushed. It should be informed, supported, and honored every step of the way.
At Simple Steps Fertility, we’re here to walk beside you. Whether you’re ready to apply or just want to learn more, we’ll meet you where you are with compassion, clarity, and care.
Curious if surrogacy is right for you?
Start with our short eligibility quiz and see what’s possible.